“Ten days before my husband’s heart failure, I participated in a demo session with Lisa Schwarz. I had asked her to give me a way of describing CRM® to people so they would understand the difference between this and standard [redacted for legal reasons]. She said a demo was the only sure way to make that clear. I now believe that was God’s providence preparing me for what was to come. Like many of my clients, when the EMDR and [redacted for legal reasons] sessions cleared away the experience of the trauma, I was left with the original developmental trauma that lay beneath. Time after time, my clients would experience relief from the presenting symptoms and an initial peace and enthusiasm, only to show up later describing an innate sense of loneliness, disconnection, and unworthiness. The degree of the experience varied, but the presence of the sense was consistent. After that one session, my experience of myself as apart from others was almost gone. The sense that I was one mistake from being voted off the planet was changed to an acceptance of myself as both flawed and amazing in the eyes of God in very real ways. It felt lovely to be me. The sessions I had with clients before leaving for the fateful vacation were amazing. When I got back to work weeks later, those clients had experienced similar gains to varying degrees. I firmly believe I would be in much worse shape than I am today, two days after the memorial, we’re it not for that breakthrough session. I would not have been able to allow myself to receive the love and support I’ve been blessed with. My ability to manage the self-blame for not seeing the symptoms and all the other voices in my head would have been abysmal.”
This page contains redactions in compliance with an Order of the United States District Court for the Southern District of New York, in the matter of Grand v. Schwarz, 15-CV-8779. A copy of this Order is available at the following link: Grand v. Schwarz Order- March 27, 2018.